So anyway, it was about 1995. I drank a 40 of Crazy Horse with my old pal Devious from the Eyesores (I was the drummer of this fucking perennial San Jose laughingstock). We had just struck out with some girls. I was drunk.
So, I had my dad's old 1950 Chevy and I had it parked in a liquor store parking lot.
From what I was told, here's what happened:
I went into the liquor store and knocked over the whole rack of cigarettes on the counter, in an attempt to impress the breezies, which you know they loved.
They called the cops and I got hauled in and spent one of my many free nights in the county jail.
The next morning I got released with a notice to appear, blah blah, the usual bullshit.
Somehow Devious and the girls were not there waiting for me.
So in itself that's a pretty boring story, but the reason I wrote this was because of the following:
I went back to the liquor store lot in the AM to retrieve my truck and go home (which is an interesting tale in itself, because I lost my keys).
So I'm sitting there trying to start the truck, and all of a sudden this girl walking a retarded guy comes by to go into the store, you know, the rear foot dragging, curled wrist type. And while he's walking he's singing at the top of his retarded lungs "Saving all my love for you". I could hear him from several hundred feet away all the way into the store. So he's walking by me screaming "Tonight, is the night, that I'm feeeeeeeling all right, we'll be making love the whoooole niiight throoooough" and so on, and I am sitting there trying to hotwire my dad's truck, hung over as fuck in the hot sun.
Oh god, I am so glad I quit drinking.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
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